Shaman Idol
by rawr879
Summary: [Ren x Pirika] 'Win a pair plane trip from Hokkaido to Tokyo with Ren Tao! Limited to 150 pairs.' Tamao has won free tickets to Tokyo, and Pirika is going with her. On the way she meets the chinese idol, who is looking for a Shaman Bride.
1. Plane Ride

**Shaman Idol**

by Clarinet Koko

Disclaimer: I do not own Shaman King. ;;

Completely AU fic, although Shamans and spirits DO exist. Fic inspired while watching the news. They were going on the news how Pak Yonha or something was doing this tour thing on the special express for a special 300 people in Japan. o.o; So I thought, hey, why not Ren as our idol? D

* * *

"Are you even listening to me, Pirika?"

The girl in question blinked, looking up at her friend Tamao's face. "What?"

She sighed gustily, rolling her eyes. "Oh, nevermind. Tell me what you seemed so preoccupied about."

"I'm trying to figure out how to pay for the damned door and window my brother just ran over again and the plane ticket to Tokyo."

Tamao raised an eyebrow. "You're brother ran over someones door and window?"

"Yes. As if the stupid vase wasn't enough. And that old lady with the lawsuit. We'll be living on the streets before we know it."

Yes, her stupid oniichan just had to break things all over the place with his stupid snowboard. Before, her brother had been taking care of these problems by himself secretely, but it turned out that he was running out of money from paying for all those window panes he'd broken. Which was why he'd resorted to calling home. She'd nearly blown a capillary when she had first found out.

So every once in a while, Pirika would have to send some money over to her oh-so-sweet oniichan, so he could resume his normal life and not get beaten up into jail, or somewhere equally appaling.

But now? He apparently needed her help in Tokyo, since he had run into a particulary nasty rich family. The kind who were so snobby and annoying and had a thing about vases and portraits.

"But Pirika," Tamao said, grinning in a manner that did not match Pirika's mood at all. "You don't need a plane ticket to Tokyo."

"What am I going to do then? Walk over by foot?"

"Remember the contest I entered? The Ren one?"

A few weeks ago, Tamao had been showing her a cut of from her favorite magazine... Of the famous chinese idol, Ren Tao. Apparently she was quite crazy about him now, now that she had finally given up on Yoh Asakura ("I mean, I've got to face reality... He has Anna-san as a fiance, and I know he likes me as a friend and all, but it is so obvious he loves her."). Although, in Pirika's opinion, the chinese superstar was much more far away then Yoh.

And beneath that glossy picture of him, was a small form and an advertisement. 'Win a pair plane trip from Hokkaido to Tokyo with Ren Tao! Limited to 150 pairs.' Could there be anymore of a perfect chance? Of course the Ren fanatic just had to enter...

"Well, I GOT IN!"

...and win.

"You won? Out of those millions of people?"

Tamao puffed out her chest proudly. "Yes. So you can come with me to Tokyo, and rescue your brother for free. Plus, we get to meet REN TAO!"

Obviously, Pirika had no interest in this 'Ren Tao'. She was just participating because she needed to. In her opinion, those TV stars were a bunch of snobs who just happened to be cuter then the rest of the people, and got paid to just stand there and look pretty. Pathetic.

"Oh, Tamao, how can I thank you?" Pirika gushed. This was one problem solved, obviously. Now there was only the problem of how to pay for the door and window. She could look into her college money, maybe. She never meant to go to college, anyway... But one thing was clear: There was no money left in her brothers account. Why else would he be calling? It wasn't like he needed much money regularly, of course. He was safe in the hands of Yoh back in Funbari-ga-oka, staying and eating for free at the 'En'. It had obviously been used up paying for other peoples door.

...Which, come to think of it, she would need to majorly thank Yoh and Anna-san for. How much money her brother would cost for food alone, she shivered to even think about.

"When are we going, by the way?"

Her friend took out a small envelope from her pocket. "Um, let me see... It says March 22. Hey, wait a minute, isn't it the 21st today?"

Silence.

"TOMORROW? WE ARE GOING TOMORROW?"

"Um, I guess."

"How am I supposed to find enough money to pay for my stupid oniichan by TOMORROW?"

Tamao gave her a meek look. "Um, just... find some?"

"Well, what are you waiting for?" she snapped, trying to conjure a plan fast enough so they would be in time for tomorrow.

"Oh, but it leaves the port at 11, and we'll get there at 1. So I don't think we'll have to hurry too much."

Instead, she recieved a withering glare. "Of course we have to hurry. Have you packed? What about your clothes? What about a place to stay?"

She shrugged. "Nope. Haven't packed. I'll pack the moment I get home. And I'm sure Yoh will let us stay at the 'En'."

It was all Pirika could do to keep herself from giving her friend a disgusted look. "Oh, whatever. Well, shoo, Tamao, go pack!"

"Meet me tomorrow at the Sapporo Airport Station at 9, okay?" Tamao said brightly, handing her one of the tickets. "The JR line, don't forget!"

She turned to left, but Pirika just had to thank her best friend one last time. "I'll never be able to pay you back, Tamao. You rule!" Pirika said, hugging Tamao. She in return hugged her back and laughed lightly. "Anything for my friend. And it was just luck, too. Even if you hadn't needed to go to Tokyo, I would have invited you, you know."

'And I wouldn't have gone with you.' she silently thought. Not that she was going to say it out aloud... she didn't want to hurt her friends feelings. And it wasn't Tamao's fault Pirika had a thing about TV stars.

"I'm sure we'll have the best time of our lives, Pirika, I promise!" she gushed, and after one last smile, Tamao skipped away out of Pirika's door, looking like she was the worlds most happiest girl.

Pirika really wished she could feel happy about it, too.

vvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvv

"Ohmygodohmygodohmygodohmygod, Pirika, Ren Tao is riding that airplane!"

Tamao was busy squealing in her ear as Pirika, on the otherhand, dully inspected her own ticket. "We're riding the Tao Private Jet instead of the regular airplanes?"

"Of course! Ren-sama is a very important person, he won't ride anything but his private jets."

Great. Snob trait #1. Don't ride anything normal people ride.

"And why is he inviting 300 people on his private jet?"

"Well, the article said that he wanted to thank the Japanese fans for being so supportive of him, so he decided to show his thanks by inviting a special 150 pairs to his jet, and entertain them. He's going to tour around the jet, Pirika! WE'RE GOING TO SEE HIM UP CLOSE!"

A blank look. "So?"

Tamao looked absolutely appaled at Pirika's reply. "So? SO? Noone doesn't know him, Pirika, and everyone wants to see him live! Fans are desperate! Did you know people were offering 1,000,000 yen (roughly 10,000 dollars is US) for one of these tickets?"

1000000 yen? That could pay off for a new door and a window, plus buy a few brand new snowboards! She stared at the tickets in her hand, now seeing them in an all new light. 100000 yen...

No. Must get a grip. Do not think of selling these tickets to passerbys. Do not think of a new snowboard, or the prospect of not having to work part time all day just to pay off for a new door, or not having to ride a jet full of screaming noisy fangirls.

"Look, they've opened the gates!" Tamao squealed yet again, and was now pulling her hard towards the gate. "I want to get a glimpse of him before-"

They were immediately run over by a hoard of screaming fangirls, all heading towards the gateway. The Japanese policemen looked astonioshed as they tried to stop them from entering at the same time. The whole waiting area was filled with a deafening roar of the Ren Tao fans, all chanting one word: "REN! REN! REN!"

And they were going to ride in the same plane for two hours with those people?

Hello, hell.

"I'm beginning to have second thoughts. What about you, Tamao?" Pirika asked sweetly, cocking her head towards the hoard by the gateway.

Tamao looked dazed as well, staring at the screaming crowd. "W-wow... I-I never thought..."

"Please, calm down, and calmly line up in a single line- no entry for people who do not have tickets!" the guards were shouting, but it was as good as useless. Everyone was scrambling towards the entry with only one sole person in mind.

The guard must have been fed up with them, since he suddenly roared, "EVERYONE WHO DOES NOT HAVE A TICKET AND TRIES TO ENTER WILL BE ARRESTED!"

The roar diminuished slightly, but everyone who did have tickets were scrambling to get there first.

"W-well, I guess we better line up..." Tamao said faintly, clutching her small traveling bag tightly to herself. Pirika was seriously doubting her decision of agreeing to come to this crazy fan ride.

But really, did she have a choice? It was her only chance to save a bit of money. Her oniichan needed her. Think of oniichan. Think of Yoh. Do not think of screaming raging fangirls.

Despite the uncontrollable crowd, the two did manage to break in, after the guard gave their tickets a critical look. After being smashed and pushed and shoved, of course.

"Tamao," Pirika said in a flat tone. "I'm tired already."

Tamao was panting slightly as well, once they were inside the cool hall leading to the inside. "M-me too..."

They didn't have a chance to talk, since a particularly snobby looking attendance headed over to them and glared. "Tickets." She said in a mean voice, extending a hand. The girls both quickly scrambled to get their tickets as they handed over to her. After examining it critically as well, she said in an even meaner voice, "Go straight, seat 24A and 24B."

Pirika sighed and accepted their tickets. "C'mon, I want to sleep..."

But it was clear that she would not be getting any sleep here. The roar inside the jet was even louder and tremendous then the lobby. Girls were excitedly leaping up and down from their seats, scanning the area for their chinese idol.

Even more pathetic. And loud. Headache-ingly loud.

"...This is giving me a migraine."

Tamao gave her a worried look. "I'm so sorry, Pirika, I didn't think it would so- so loud!"

Loud? That had to be the understatement of the year. Try crazy.

After about 10 minutes trying to wade through the hoard, they finally found just two lone empty seats waiting for them. It was almost a miracle how there were still two seats that were vacant in the midst of the crazy atmostphere. Even after sitting safely in their seats, it was almost impossible to catch sleep on the plane that was almost exploding with sound. Pirika almost hated Tamao for winning those stupid tickets at that moment.

"Welcome to the private Tao jet, please take a seat and fasten your seatbelts. It would also make it easier for Ren-sama to go around longer and faster if it is quiet around the plane."

The effect was instantaneous. The jet was plunged into immediately silence. Pirika couldn't believe she was sitting in the same jet she had been sitting in a second ago. The things they did for drama stars...

Silence was maintained for the first few minutes of the flight as they were all ordered to fasten their seatbelts. However, normal chit-chat between the girls resumed soon and it almost seemed like a normal plane ride. Almost.

Stupid headache. Stupid migraine. Stupid people.

"Tamao, I'm going to go wash my face..." Pirika mumbled, and immediately got up from her seat. Tamao gave her a worried look. "Are you okay? I'm so sorry about this, Pirika... You were right, we should have come on a normal plane."

She just gave a sigh in return. "Whatever, Tamao." Although it did make her feel guilty about acting so cold towards her best friend who had managed to snag plane tickets to Tokyo for free, she was just plain_ tired_.

Pirika made her way through the aisle, looking around for the restroom. But the nearest two had lines so long, they would probably arriving at Tokyo before she got even near the restrooms.

So there was only one other choice: go look for another restroom towards the front of the plane, which was labeled private. Where, it was rumoured, the Ren Tao was residing.

Oh, joy.

Sighing, she crept towards the door that seperated the front and back part of the plane. It seemed like it occured to none of the fangirls to go and find the great ones room, but that didn't really matter.

The compartment like door slid silently closed, and Pirika quickly scanned the hallway. It sure didn't seem like the inside of a plane here. More like the inside of an expensive hotel. But Pirika only needed to use the restroom quick- and then she was going to get the hell out of there.

Bingo. A door with the restroom mark was right in front of her, just a few steps away...

But she gave an almighty shriek as she caught sight of the bulky formed spirit, which had suddenly appeared from nowhere. The spirit looked equally stunned as Pirika fell over right on her butt out of surprise.

"You can see me?" The spirit asked, still looking stunned.

Pirika seemed incapable of speech for a second, staring at the spirit of a warrior.

"Why the hell is there a dead spirit in this brand new plane?" she said, suddenly in an even more fouler mood. This was one heck of a ride, that was for sure.

The spirit, on the contrary, looking excited, said, "So you can see me? I must tell bocchama about this!"

"Bocchama? Who's bocchama?"

But the weird spirit was already flying towards his master to report this exciting news... Pirika was really beginning to regret trying to come and find a bathroom up near the Private Lounge range, where the legendary 'Ren Tao' was rumoured to be staying at, since no one was allowed to enter except the staff. It also bothered her that a spirit like that happened to be haunting the all new private ship to Tokyo.

So naturally, her first instinct was to run away back to good old 'economy' class where the famous Ren Tao would be visiting last... not that she was looking forward to it. Why coudn't they just have taken a nice, normal plane instead of one with a famour idol on it, bringing along 300 other screaming, screeching fans? Or better yet, a simple ship?

Granted, it was free. Which helped, since she was nearly broke after paying up for all the damage her idiot brother caused.

Whether she was lucky Tamao had won it for free, or unlucky that she had to ride back to Tokyo from Hokkaido without the help of sleep during the ride, she still didn't know.

"Miss, this is a private part of the plane; Tao-sama will be touring shortly, so it would help if you returned to your compartment."

Pirika whirled around to be met by an attendance giving her the evil eye. "Uh, yeah, I was just, um, looking for the bathroom." She mumbled, stumbling backwards, and ran to the nearest door.

"Hey, wait a-"

She didn't turn around to meet the attendance as she slammed the door shut and leaned against the door, her heart thumping.

This was so not turning into an enjoyable plane trip.

And it only had to turn for the worse when she heard a familiar voice... the familiar voice she was so used to hearing on those popular Chinese dramas, and on the news.

"Who the hell are you, and what do you want?"

Pirika slowly raised her eyes... to be met by the golden eyes belonging to the chinese idol, Ren Tao.

* * *

Leave a review if you like, please. Will update as fast as I can... although I need to finish my Inuyasha one too. Which I am having a major authors block on. And for those of you fluff starved readers, I'm writing a series of one-shots... all Ren/Piri of course. Take a shot at it too if you will? Thanks. Will updated asap! 


	2. First Name

**Shaman Idol**

Chapter 2: First Name

Sorry for the long wait... anyway, here's chapter 2! Thank you for the reviews.) I live in Japan too, and I got all this idea from the Yon-sama ideal, lol. I'm not a big fan of him, or anything, but my mom is. (cough) Well, enjoy the next chapter...

* * *

"Well?" He glared impatiently at her, tapping his foot. 

And then she noticed the bulky formed spirit she had just seen, sitting on the ground stiffly.

"YOU!" She shrieked, pointing at him. "I never want to see you again. Ever." One thing she hated was stray spirits, although this one didn't seem very stray since the dratted chinese idol was apparently his owner. Besides, you never know when the stray spirits might decide to stalk you, and follow you everyone... including the bathroom.

He looked slightly hurt at this. "What did Bason do to offend the young lady?"

"You can see him?" The Chinese idol asked incredulously, looking back and forth at her and the spirit who was apparently called 'Bason'. "Is she the girl you were talking about?"

Bason nodded, still looking hurt. "Yes. I met her at the hall."

Argh. She should have stuck to the regular bathrooms. Any other girl, she was sure, would have loved to be in the position she was in now. But Pirika? No freaking way.

"You're excused, Bason." he said offhandedly, and the spirit immediately disappeared.

Ren suddenly grabbed her, examing her closely, and way too intensely for Pirika's liking. He was making her nervous, and she could feel a faint blush rising on her cheeks.

"You'll do." He said, finally letting go of her. "Do you own a spirit?"

She blinked. A spirit? Kororo might count, but she _was_ oniichan's, anyway. "No. But oniichan owns one. She's a nature spirit." Pirika said proudly. "Oniichan will be shaman king someday!"

"Your oniichan, eh?" he sneered. "I bet I could beat him with my hands tied behind my back."

Pirika responded by stomping hard on his foot. "DON'T YOU MAKE FUN OF ONIICHAN!"

"OUCH! This is why I don't like fangirls..."

Wrong thing to say. "I AM NOT A FANGIRL!" Another stomp, on the other foot.

"Why the _hell_ did you enter this idiotic contest if you aren't one of those pathetic fangirls?" He quickly took note of Pirika's raised foot and hastily added, "Stomp on my foot again and I'll oversoul on you and throw you out the plane."

Scowling, Pirika answered with crossed arms. "My friend won it. I only agreed because I needed to go to Tokyo quick to save oniichan from getting sued..."

Oops. She wasn't supposed to say that. How embarassing was it, admiting to some kind of stranger who was stinking rich that your brother was about to get sued?

Too late, an evil grin was appearing on the arrogant star in front of her. "Sued? Now what could your _strong_ future _shaman king_ to be brother have done to get sued?"

She could feel her face burning with embarassment, and the only way to relieve it, she knew, was to punch something- preferrably the face of the person standing in front of her. She felt a giggle bubble up inside her at the image of her fist sinking into pretty boy's face. Imagine what Tamao would say!

"And what are _you_ laughing at?"

"I'm imagining how face would look, all smashed up by my fist."

Ren scowled at her. "Feisty, aren't you? You should actually be on your knee's right now, begging for me to kiss you."

She shuddered at the thought. "You? Kissing me? Ew. I'd rather have a dog kiss me then having a guy like _you _kiss me."

Apparently, that was the wrong thing to say. As explained when she was shoved roughly onto the wall, her arms pinned roughly by the chinese idol. Who knew the famous star idolized by everyone would be so short tempered?

"You," he hissed, his eyes narrowing at her. "Are way to cocky for your own good."

"Oh yeah? And you're just a plain old arrogant boy too full of himself, only famous because of his equally arrogant father."

His father was a touchy subject for Ren, apparently. His eyes flashed dangerously as he hissed again, "Do you think I _like _this stupid job? My father is actually forcing me to do this stupid posing and acting because he thinks it'll be good advertisement for his stupid company! Good advertisement my ass." He looked genuinuely disgusted.

"But he promised something, before this stupid Japanese tour." Ren said softly, tracing her lips with his fingers. This was really spooking her up; what was he trying to tell her? Besides, he wasn't supposed to even be touching her, damn it.

"Let me go." She said in a dangerous tone, wriggling slightly. "I don't give a damn about your 'promise'." Who cared what kind of promise his idiot father made with his idiot son? Not her, that was for sure.

His grip tightened around her wrist, and Pirika could just feel the bruises appearing on her skin.

"Marry me."

Time froze as Pirika stared at Ren incredulously. She must have heard wrong. No way would a famous TV oscar winning star ask her to marry her. Her! Plain old Pirika Usui who had an idiot brother and money problems.

His grip loosened slightly, and Pirika quickly took a step back, seizing the opportunity. "...Are you on crack?" she asked weakly, tucking her hands behind the safety of her back.

He explained how deadly serious he was when he suddenly grabbed her, tipped her chin and laid an intense, wonderful kiss on her.

Well, in her opinion. At first. And then reality seemed to sink in, reminding her who exactly it was kissing her and that this kiss happened to be her very first kiss. Quickly she broke away, pushing him off, panting slightly.

"Y-you, you!" she spluttered, too furious to think of anything witty to say.

"Yes?" Ren asked in a taunting voice. He actually had the nerve to look amused!

"You... you can't just _kiss_ me!"

"So? You're going to marry me; of course I can kiss you."

The chinese star was immediately met by a fist in the face. "WHY THE HELL WOULD I MARRY A BASTARD LIKE YOU?"

He scowled, glaring as he rubbed his nose which, to Pirika's disappointment, wasn't bleeding or broken. "It's not like you have a choice. I don't have a choice, either. Because I'm tired of this stupid job, pleasing my stupid manager and my stupid 'fans'."

That wasn't fair. She knew for a fact that Tamao worshipped him. She was one of those classical diehard fans. In fact, she was pretty sure she was the only girl in her whole school who didn't have a poster of Ren Tao in her locker or room.

"And my father said I could quit this job if I find a wife, so _you_ are going to be my wife."

"You could go and pick out one of your fans and marry them." she snapped. "I'm pretty sure everyone will be making a line, fighting over for you."

"And you aren't one of my fans, are you?" Ren asked snobbishly. It infuriated her even more, and it took all her self-control to keep from giving him another punch in the face.

"I hate you, Ren Tao, for your information. I hate all celebrities." She informed him, walking over to the door. "Now if you'll excuse me, my friend is waiting for me."

But of course he had to stop her again. "Not so fast, girl. Tell me your name."

This time he recieved a grand stomp on the foot. "Like hell I'll give you my name." She flicked her blue hair and reached for the door again.

She was stopped again as he roughly pushed her against the door, trapping her with his arms. "Do you have to act so difficult and bitchy all the time?"

"Let go, or I'll make sure I break your nose this time." she threatened, waving her fist in his face. God, who did he think he was, ordering her around and calling her a bitch?

"Tell me your name, and I'll let you go."

"Why does it have to be me, anyway? I'm sure a lot of other girls would love to marry you."

He scowled again, and, as ashamed as Pirika was to admit it, he looked even more cute close up. "My father wants a pure, shaman bride. And shaman's happen to be rare, don't they?"

"You want a shaman bride? I'll introduce you to my friend; I'm sure she'll just _love_ to marry you. Don't worry, she can see spirits just like me. Unlike me, she can actually handle spirits too. I'm sure you'll just _love_ her."

She tried to break away again, but Ren wouldn't budge at all. "No. I want you."

_'I want you.'_ The three magical words that must have melted girls all over Japans hearts, and which Ren had used in a few drama's he had starred in. Pirika felt her heart speed up just a little bit, but disgust soon took over.

"You won't get everything you want, Tao. I'm one thing you'll never be able to buy with money." she snapped, shoving him roughly. "Go find some other willing girl to marry."

Finally, finally, she was free, practically running out the room into the hall. "See you in hell, Tao!" She yelled back, running as fast as she could away from the room.

"You forgot something, _Pirika_."

Who cared if she forgot something? It could hardly be important, could it? Besides, it was probably a scheme to keep her from running away.

Wait a minute. Why did he know her name?

She whipped her head back, a sense of dread coming to her.

And there he was, casually flipping open her light blue cellphone, pressing the buttons as if he owned it. "Could Tamao be your shaman friend?" He called out to her, and she could see the infuriating smirk on his face. "And your brother, Horohoro? He must be the _strong_ shaman brother with the _nature spirit_. Oh, he broke someones _door_, did he? And you're going to Tokyo to _bail him out_, aren't you?"

She longed to break his nose and more, as he read through her mail. HER mail! Her PRIVATE MAIL! What business did he have? This surely had to be an invasion of privacy!

"And about your comment about celebrities," he said, a casual grin on his face. "I think you are way too narrow-minded. I'm pretty sure there are nice celebrities out there. Like me, of course." She gave a guffaw. Him? Mr-force-an-innocent-girl-to-marriage, nice?

"Well, maybe I'm not that _nice_," he said, pressing more buttons onthe cellphone. Excuse me, HER cellphone! "But take your pink haired friend here." Was he going through her photos, too? "She can easily be a model. With her radiant pink hair and right friends, I'm sure she'll be on the cover of _Cosmo_ just like _that_. Would you chuck your friend here if she became a model suddenly?"

"Tamao isn't going to be a _model_!" she spluttered. "She's a very shy girl, you know."

Ren sighed, twirling her cellphone by the Kororo strap. "It's just an example, _Pirika_. But anyway, I'm just telling you to stop being so narrow-minded and give me a chance."

"Earn your own chance, Tao." she snapped, jumping for her cellphone, to no avail. He was too quick for her.

"Why do you keep on calling me Tao, anyway, _Pirika_? If you're going to marry me, you should be calling me by my first name instead."

"In your dreams, _Tao_. Now give me back my phone. MY phone!" She lunged again, but collided into him instead.

He gave a smirk, taunting her with the cellphone. "Marry me, then."

Hmm. Cellphone or forced marriage?

"I hate you, Tao, and I hope you rot in hell." Pirika snapped, stomping on his foot again. But this time Ren quickly avoided it, a smirk still evident on his face.

"Ren-sama, it's time for your tour..." A woman wearing a brisk looking suit had come over, trailing off at the sight of the unexpected guest. "Shall I call security?" She asked critically, glaring at Pirika.

Great. She probably thought she was some kind of mad stalker. Call security? _She_ needed the help of security, not _him_. Someone should take him away, quick.

"There's no need." Ren said with a smirk, not taking his eyes off Pirika. "I want you to cancel the tour."

Silence. Pirika sneaked a look at the woman, who seemed expressionless. "You want to cancel the tour."

"Yep." Ren said easily as if there wasn't a plane full of fangirls waiting for him.

Pirika swore she saw a vein pulse in the woman's forehead. "And what do you suggest I do to the fans waiting impatiently to see you?"

"I don't know, offer them refunds or whatever. Besides, this thing was free, wasn't it?"

"Ren-sama." The woman said, looking like she wanted to strangle him to death. "There are 300 people, waiting over there just to see you. You will give them the tour they've ben waiting for, or I will have to report back to your father about your incooperation again. He has personally appointed me as your manager, and I will not disappoint him."

He glared back at the woman. "Screw father. I don't care about my fans, and I don't care a bit about father either. I'm too busy entertaining my fiance." And to Pirika's mortification, he pulled her to him as he wrapped his arms around her waist. "You see, I have finally found the love of my life, my soulmate..."

The woman rolled her eyes. "Kindly do not make fun of the script for your next drama- although I am pleased to know you have actually memorized some of it."

Oh. Figures. No wonder those words sounded so foreign out of his mouth.

"Go away, Yuna." He said, scowling, and still not letting go of her. "I want to enjoy my limited time with my fiance here."

Who the hell was Yuna? And why was he calling her his fiance already? She'd never agreed! "I AM NOT YOUR FIANCE!"

Once again she was released from his iron grip after stomping on his foot.

'Yuna' looked horrified as Pirika aimed another fist at his nose, and, to Pirika's pleasure, she heard a satisfying crunch of broken bones. "That's for going through my private things, bastard!"

And then she grabbed her cellphone from his grip and ran far, far away from the crazy guy, who was currently bleeding from the nose.

"Hey, you! Wait up!" Yuna yelled, but Pirika didn't bother looking back.

vvvvvvvvvvvvvv

Tamao looked up, looking slightly bewildered at the sight of her friend, gasping for air as she leaned against the seat.

"Pirika... are you okay?" she asked worriedly. "Should I go ask for some water?"

Pirika shook her head, gripping her cellphone tightly. "I-I'm okay..."

Her good friend gave her another worried glance, but said nothing more about it. "Did you hear? Ren-sama is going to be touring soon!"

Nooooo. She'd finally been released from his evil clutches, only to be found again in the middle of the fangirl mob? Maybe she could hide underneath the seats, or in the bathroom till everything passed... But the seats were way too small and the bathroom was still filled with girls.

"Attention, fans. Ren-sama will be touring the plane soon. It would be best if everyone is seated safely in their seats."

All the girls, including the ones lining up for the bathroom, went scrambling back towards their seat. Thus, the bathroom was now completely empty. Which meant she could go hide in there, and wait till the evil idol passed.

"Listen, Tamao, I'm going to go hide in the bathroom... okay? I'll come back after all the screaming stops."

Before Tamao could reply, she was already out of her own seat, and earning glares from all around. She was running blindly again, with one sole destination and refuge: the bathroom.

But of course it just had to go wrong.

"Ack! I'm so-"

Pirika had gone barreling into a familiar looking woman who had just entered their section. A very familiar looking woman.

"YOU!" The evil bastard's evil manager snarled, pointing to the innocent ainu girl. "YOU'RE the one who-"

"Yuna, Yuna, Yuna. I don't mind _a bit _about it."

And there he was, standing there like he owned the plane. (Well, he did. But that doesn't matter.) She was pleased to know that his nose looked rather purple, although the bleeding had evidently stopped. God must hate her so much. What did she to do to have to cope with an evil tempered bastard like him?

But it was obviously the wrong move, Ren speaking up like that and appearing from behind. The roar was too much for Pirika's poor sensitive ears, and even clamping her hands over her ears did nothing to help.

Fans were already jumping out of their seats, throwing themselves at him. "REN-SAMAAAAAAA!"

His manager was standing protectively in front of the said idol, desperately trying to calm the crazy fans. "Please, please, he will be touring everyone individually, so please return to your seats!"

Who cared about the woman in a business suit, shielding their favorite star? No one, of course. She must have underestimated the obsessiveness of the fangirls, since she was almost immediately swallowed up by the huge crowd; but fear not, the other bodyguards had arrived. This time, they were big bulky men in black suits and sunglasses, who were rather successfully stopping them. (More then his manager, anyway)

And he stood in the middle, smirking as if the sight before him was something extremely amusing, crossing his arms.

Pirika tried to crawl out from the hoard, nearly getting oxygen shortage. It was way too much for her small body. Why oh why did she have to step foot into this cursed jet? She felt someone stop her, grabbing her by the collar of her pink jacket.

"Let go, I'm NOT a fan-" It wasn't one of the bodyguards trying to arrest her. It was, you guessed it, THE Ren Tao.

Where did all her luck go? It must have evaporated the moment her brother called her.

And so she did the only thing that seemed sensible then: she screamed. A high-pitched, glass-shattering scream that was even louder then the roar of the fans put all together.

Startled, he quickly let go of her, and the plane was enveloped by silence.

"Who screamed?" His manager said, looking around. "Was it you, Ren-sama?"

He looked insulted. "I don't have that much of a high-pitched scream, Yuna."

One of the bodyguards seemed to realize it had been Pirika who had screamed, and snatched her by the collar again. Not very gently. "And who are _you_, missy?"

Innocent cute looking face mode, all out. "H-he..." she said, hitching fake sobs and pointing to the tongari head. "He t-tried to molest and kidnap m-meeeee!"

She was met by an even more deafening silence. And then, of course, the fatal roar before Ren's manager could say anything back to Pirika.

"MOLEST ME, REN-SAMA!"

"YOU CAN KIDNAP ME ALL YOU WANT!"

"TAKE MEEEEEEE!"

It was the most pathetic sight Pirika had ever laid eyes on. And they were of the same species? She felt ashamed for her own gender.

His manager was now bashing at people with her clipboard, roaring profanities as she tried to beat away all the girls, to no avail. But the bodyguards managed to ward them all off, after yelling, "REN-SAMA WILL CANCEL THIS TOUR IF EVERYONE DOES NOT GO BACK TO THEIR SEATS _NOW_!"

And just like the time they announced how it would easier for their idol to tour if the plane was silent, everyone immediately scrambled back towards their seats, eyes shining. But of course they managed to scream, "REN-SAMAAAAAAAAA!" in perfect harmony as they returned to their seats.

Pirika, meanwhile, was still being held hostage by the scary looking men in black. "Can I go back?" She asked in her most look-at-cute-little-me voice.

The MIB frowned at her, studying her critically from behind the glasses. "I don't know... We'll have to ask Ren-sama."

"Throw her in my room." He said boredly. "Make sure she doesn't escape."

Everyones eyes bugged out at this. "WHAT?"

He looked pretty annoyed as he snapped at the bodyguards, "I SAID, keep her in my room! She's going to be my-"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!"

The fatal high-pitched scream once again, but this time it was accompanied by her fist again as she broke away from the bodyguards and launched herself at him. "DIE, TAO, DIE!"

He avoided her skillfully, catching her fist easily. "No more playing, Pirika. Now be a good girl and follow the nice man."

A good girl? Who did he think she was? A six year old? And the guy in front of her looking nothing like a 'nice' man. More like menacing. She was pretty sure he had a gun hidden inside his suit.

"Ren-sama, will you please explain?" Yuna said briskly, flashing her eyes threateningly at Pirika. "You told me before that she is your-"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

She did NOT need all of the fangirls to hear how their one and only star had actually proposed to her at first sight. She would, she was sure, be murdered and skinned alive by all of them the second they heard the word 'fiance'. Of course, they were suspecting enough already, all of them glaring daggars at her from their seats.

"Will you please stop _screaming_?" Ren hissed into her ear. "We are getting enough attention as it is."

"I will scream," she snarled. (Quietly, so no one would hear.) "If you do not let go of me. And I will scream," she added, "If you dare utter the f-word or the m-word, or force me to marry you again."

He sighed in mock defeat. "Alright, Pirika. But," OF COURSE there would be a but in there somewhere. This was Ren Tao she was dealing with, after all. His voice was lowered, and it came out oddly husky and sexy. "Meet me in front of my room after we get to Tokyo."

No freaking way was she going there.

"...Or else I'll have to resort to drastic measures, where I will have to announce to the whole wide world that you are my-"

"Okay, okay! I get the idea! I'll go, okay? But you utter a word to the press or to your fans, and you'll wish you never met me."

A raised eyebrow. "Deal, then. You better go, if looks could kill you'd be long dead."

He was right, of course. The fangirls were still glaring at her, wondering who the hell the strange blue haired girl was, talking to _their_ Ren. They had no idea that Pirika would have rather faced a hundred sharks then the person in front of her.

The moment he said the magic word, Pirika shot out of his territory, muttering profanities under her breath. Why did she have to be bossed around by a lunatic like him? An attention-seeking, egostical-

"Pirika?"

Tamao was looking at her worriedly again, obviously noticing the dark cloud above the ainu girl's head. It was quite a scary sight to see, as she was usually in a good happy-go-lucky mood whenever they were going to meet her brother. This time happened to be, however, an exception.

Instead of replying, she stomped to her seat, still muttering under her breath, and roughly sat down onto the plush seat. "Yes- I- am- OKAY!"

She really, really hated Ren Tao.

* * *

Yeah, I know it's not the best... I didn't proofread it much. o.o; Sorry. Anyway, for those of you who want fluff see my other story "Sweet Dreams". ) Hear my shameless advertising... hehe. Review if you like! 


	3. Stalker!

**Shaman Idol**

Chapter 3: Stalker!

Disclaimer: Shaman King does not belong to me.

Uh. Yes. I'm alive. I just... lost my love for RenPiri (and Shaman King in general), but I _will _try and complete this. I like this plot, and I really should finish all my fics. Sorry it's short and late, though. >.> I'll try writing more.

* * *

Pirika wondered why she had even bothered showing up, waiting for an arrogant idol who she knew for sure would bring nothing but bad, bad news. It had been a great ordeal coming up with a hundred lies for her best friend, who did nothing wrong but drag her to this stupid airplane. The flight alone had given her an even bigger headache, the screams not quieting at all while Ren toured.

"Glad to see you came."

She stiffled a groan, resisting the urge to run away or give him a big slap across the face. "Yes, now what do you want?"

"I called you here to arrange marriage plans-"

Her scream was probably heard all the way back to Hokkaido, and 3 bodyguards armed with scary looking guns came barging out of the next room, looking alarmed behind their sunglasses. After one look at Pirika, obviously remembering her from before, they went back to their rooms looking very uninterested.

"HOW MANY TIMES MUST I TELL YOU FOR IT TO GET THROUGH YOUR THICK HEAD? I- AM- NOT- _MARRYING YOU_!"

"Will you please stop screaming in my ear? It's not like you have a choice. You can try and avoid me, but I'll always find you."

Pirika snorted. "Oh yeah? What if I run off to America or Iraq or China? What will you do then?"

"You won't." He said confidently, crossing his arms. "You don't have the money."

...That was true. In fact, she doubted she even had enough money to go back to Hokkaido. But wait a minute. Why did _he_ know this?

Apparently Ren knew this, as he gave her a smirk and told her, "I looked you up. I know enough about you now as much as your brother."

This was not consoling at all. "I had my servants hack into a couple of servers." He said as if he was stating the weather. "Got a whole load of info about you."

She couldn't believe it. Of course keeping an online diary- although it had been completely locked and private, so only her closest friends could see it- had been a bad idea from the start. She was trapped, obviously. Was she going to end up as his showcase wife? "My brother will surely kill you." Pirika said venemously. "He'll tear you apart limb by limb, and throw you in the incinerator-"

"Ok, ok. I get the message that your dear brother is very 'strong'. But that doesn't change the fact that _you'll_ be marrying _me_. I need you, Pirika."

The sexy syrupy voice didn't fool her. "You _wish_."

"My wish is always granted. Since I have a meeting with Uchida Hikaru soon, we'll have to postpone the plans." He took out a datebook- a datebook! Who knew stars kept neat little datebooks?- and squinted his eyes, studying it. "Meet me everyday from tomorrow at 10 at... how about Kichijoji? In front of the JR station ticket gates? I don't really want to go to crowded spots; more people recognize me. Although Kichijoji is crowded as it is."

She should just ignore the crazy man who was making crazy plans. This was all probably just a dream or a hallucination. "Are you stupid? Of course people will recognize you!"

Ren shrugged again. "I'll wear sunglasses."

Pirika laughed out loud at this; sunglasses? Did he seriously think sunglasses would hide his huge pointy head? She mentioned this to him in a very 'are you stupid?' voice.

He seemed to have no problem as he waved the statement away. "I better go. My manager is going to kill me if she finds out I'm not heading over there already... If I don't find you there at 10, I'll go head over to your house and come pick you up myself."

Once again she found herself envisioning her hands wringing the damned idols neck... "I hate you, Tao."

He just gave her a smirk as he tutted her. "_Ren_, Pirika, _Ren_."

In which she only replied with a rude one fingered gesture before stalking off, fuming.

* * *

She wasn't going, of course. What kind of right-minded vulnerable girl would go to Kichijoji with an insane person like Ren Tao?

"Are you okay, Pirika? You really seem... stressed today. You're not right, ever since we rode the plane..."

The two shaman girls were riding on the train, both sitting on the heated chairs, waiting for the Funbari-ga-oka station. It seemed extremely faraway as Pirika had been mumbling curses the whole ride, wringing imaginary necks- Ren Tao's, to be exact. This really worried Tamao; it wasn't like Pirika to be so sullen for so long.

"Can you keep a secret, Tamao?"

Tamao blinked at the sudden question. "Of course... why?"

"Promise you won't tell anyone? And that you won't scream or want to kill me after I tell you?"

Now she was genuinely curious. What could it be? A proposal from the great Ren Tao? She almost laughed at that little thought; the chances had to be below zero, and she knew her friend wasn't very fond of him. She'd seen the displeasure on her face when Ren-sama had begun talking on the microphone for the tour.

"That demented lunatic wants me to marry him."

...so maybe the chances weren't below zero.

"WHAT?"

Heads turned their way, old ladies with cranes glaring at them with scary flashes of glasses. Pirika hurriedly indicated for her to shut up, looking obviously panicked. "Shhh. This isn't my fault, you know. He forced me into it. And now I need to go visit him tomorrow at Kichijoji, even though he's a lunatic let loose from the mental hospital."

"Ren-sama wants to marry _you_?" Tamao said faintly, hardly daring to believe it. The man of her dreams wanted to marry her best friend. Why did she have such bad luck in men? Or maybe this was her glorious chance to snatch him?

"Yes, but I don't want to marry an asshole like him." Pirika said, immense dislike etched in her face. "Do you think you can distract him by going to Kichijoji for me instead?"

Her dream date. A once in a life chance. Any sane girl would snatch at the opportunity. "No, Pirika, _you_ have to go."

She'd blown it. She'd tossed the winning lottery down the drain, into the shredder... Why she didn't accept her offer, she didn't know. Maybe it was because deep down, she had always known that Yoh or Ren would always be someone out of range. Unable to be obtained. And here was her best friend, suddenly getting proposed by a movie star she didn't even like!

Life was _so_ unfair.

"You'll have to drag my dead corpse to Kichijoji to get me there." Pirika scowled. "But for some reason I'm scared of what he'll do if I don't go."

"You have to go, Pirika." Tamao said soothingly. "He's Ren Tao. How many people do you think he's proposed to before?"

"You're misunderstanding something, Tamao. He wants me to marry him because if he marrys, apparently his father will let him quit this show business."

Silence.

"Nevermind, Pirika. I'll kill you if you go to Kichijoji tomorrow."

A grin formed on the ainu's face. "Kill me if I try and go. And kill Tao, too, if he shows up."

"Funbari-ga-oka! Funbari-ga-oka!"

Their boding time was interrupted as their station loomed into view. Pirika wasted no time snatching up her duffelbag and heading over to the sliding doors. "Come on, Tamao! We're going to meet oniichan!"

Tamao smiled at the happy girl who was excitedly looking out the window. This was the real Pirika.

* * *

"ONIICHAN!"

Pirika threw herself at the spiky haired ainu, tossing her duffelbag at Ryu, who was currently working at the 'En'. "I missed you so, so much!" Suddenly, she pulled away from him with a completely different scary expression. "You made me come to Tokyo."

Horohoro felt himself sweating. His sister was now glaring at him, her hands on her hips. Even Yoh and Ryu looked scared- they'd seen this expression before. On a certain scary, scary itako, just as she would raise her left hand...

SLAP!

The poor boy went flying off a few meters away, a new red handprint appearing on his right cheek. Everyone looked completely slackjawed except for Anna who had come up from behind Yoh. She regarded the Ainu siblings with cool eyes and lifted her mouth a milimeter to Pirika. It had to be the first time she'd smiled to anyone besides Yoh.

And she stalked off back into the 'En', looking oddly satisfied for some reason, leaving everyone even more slackjawed.

Pirika, on the otherhand, looked thrilled at being smiled to from the Itako. She idolized Anna very much... which would explain where she got that legendary lefthand slap.

"Pirika... don't you think you were a little too harsh?" Ryu asked timidly, holding up her blue duffelbag. The owner of 'En' himself had gone running off to Horohoro who, for the time being, seemed clearly knocked out.

She dusted off her hands, sniffing disdainfully. "No. Do you know how much it costs, paying for all the damage he does?" She snatched up her duffelbag and headed into the 'En' after Anna. Even Tamao looked surprised at the sudden slap, and she hurried off after Pirika calling her name.

"Horohoro! Are you alive?" Ryu yelled, lightly slapping him across the face again.

"Nooo," He moaned. "Forgive me, Pirika, don't kill me..."

Yoh nodded gravely. "That evil left-hand slap has that kind of effect." For once, Ryu was glad he didn't have any close women around him who would give him one of those evil slaps.

"Ergh... I guess I deserved it, though. But boy, I never knew she had such a mean slap... I shouldn't have let her near Anna too much." he said with a groan, rubbing his poor cheeks.

"Anna's not that bad." Yoh said defensively. "She's just a bit strict."

While the boy's tried to revive Horohoro, Pirika and Tamao had joined Anna on the table sipping tea. Apparently they had interrupted a moment of tea time.

A tense silence followed as Pirika fidgeted uneasily in her seat, and Tamao kept giving her meaningful glances. "You should ask for Anna's advice... she gives out good ones when it comes to men." she whispered.

Scary people like Anna are said to have a devils ear. "What?"

You can't help but cower when she pins you with those cold eyes. "Um... well..."

Tamao elbowed her hard in the ribs. "She's being chased." She said with surprising courage from a shy girl like her. "She needs advice on warding him off, right?"

The Ainu scowled at her for revealing her secret. But Anna actually seemed interested- slightly, of course- as she set down her tea. "And who the hell is this bastard chasing you?"

Pirika really had no desire letting more people know about her run in with the famous star. But then again, this was Anna. You could trust Anna... usually. "It's Tao... Ren Tao. Apparently he needs a bride, so he could quit his job as a famous drama star."

A brief silence as Anna sipped her tea again. It was broken, however, as Yoh and Ryu came inside dragging a still dead-to-the-world Horohoro with them.

"Anna okami? Can we use one of the cold sticky things for Horohoro here?"

The mistress wasn't listening to him. Her eyes never strayed from Pirika as she answered, quite cooly, "Kill him. The world could do with one less bastard."

An icy atmosphere filled the already falling apart guesthouse. It was obvious the men thought she had been talking about Horohoro, while, in truth, she had simply been giving Pirika advice. Scary and useless advice, but an advice nonetheless.

"...Uh, nevermind about the sticky thing..."

And so the girls were left alone again as the three men fled quickly from Anna's wrath. "...Kill him?"

Anna thought for a moment. "Actually, you think you could drag him here?" An evil plan was already forming in the itako's head. "And we'll advertise that the drama star is here, and then guests will be fighting to stay here-"

"I am not inviting him to stay_ here_!" Pirika spat, appalled at the very though. Him, here in this old house that threated to fall apart at the smallest earthquakes? She would never be able to live it down.

"It'll be good for the guesthouse!" She insisted. "People will pay just to step foot into this house!"

Pirika shook her head. "I rode a plane full of fangirls, and it was no picnic, I assure you. Right, Tamao?"

"Um, well, it was very loud-"

"Don't worry, we'll be making money like crazy..." The guesthouse mistress really would do anything to make money and have an easier life, wouldn't she?

"Anna, I don't think it's a good idea. I hate his guts, and I'm planning on never talking to him again-"

RRRRRING!

Pirika scrambled for her cellphone, wondering who in the world could be calling her. Only her brother, Tamao and a handful of friends had her phonenumber... And all of them rarely called her, except for her brother.

"Hello-"

"Miss me?"

Birds flew dramatically out of the trees at her high-pitched shriek of surprise. Anna looked slightly annoyed as she scowled at her. "You have one heck of a voice, girl."

And so Pirika did the only thing that seemed sane then: she hung up on him, and then turned off her cellphone. Stalkers were dangerous... she should change her cellphone number soon. She never would have even dreamed that Ren would really try and stalk her, just to get her to marry him...

"Who was it?" Tamao asked curiously. Pirika never looked so panicked from a phonecall. Not counting the call from her brother, of course.

"...Um, no one."

God, she really couldn't lie in front of Tamao... Everyone had always said her emotions came up so clearly on her face. Like now, for instance. Like the twisted, angry yet nervous expression on her face just then.

"Was it The Bastard?"

The Bastard. It was now completely capitalized like it was a real name. "...Yes, it was." Pirika admitted grudgingly, stuffing back the cellphone. "I'm not inviting him to the En, Anna, so please forget about it."

Surprising both Tamao and Pirika, Anna jutted out her lower lip very out of character-edly, crossing her arms. "Fine."

This was unbelievable. Anna wasn't supposed to just say 'fine'. She was supposed to be more forceful and threaten to ring their necks if they didn't oblige. She wasn't supposed to end it with a single word.

Sensing a trap somewhere, Pirika cautiously got up and backed out to the door. "I'm going to go see how my brother's doing..."

Tamao was up in a flash, running after Pirika. "Um, I think I'll go and see how Horohoro is doing, too."

They were pretty sure that they weren't imagining the ice cold glare boring into their backs.

* * *

Ren scowled as he tossed the phone a few feet away from him violently, chipping the plastic slightly. "Women. I don't get what the hell they want and what the hell they don't want."

"Kindly do not break the furniture, dear brother." Jun leaned over and picked up the thrown phone, setting it on the coffee table. "Now what's this about women? You can consult anything to your sister."

His scowl deepened. "Do me a favor and tell father to take back his ridiculous conditions. I don't mind if you kill him in the process."

Jun grinned. "Women trouble, dear brother? Do you hate your current job that much?"

"Must I say more?"

"You just have to marry, Ren. You can pick anyone out of the tidal wave of fangirls who are camping out in front of our mansion."

Fangirls were camping out in front of their mansion? That just proved more how pathetic humans were.

"Father wants a pure shaman bride, Jun." He said stiffly. "You know that."

Why the hell was her smile getting wider? "And I guess you found one already, considering your temper and all. That lucky girl must have fainted with pleasure when you proposed to her."

"Oh, no." Ren answered sarcastically. "She just had to scream with _pleasure_."

_"WHY THE HELL WOULD I MARRY A BASTARD LIKE YOU?"_

Yeah. With complete utter pleasure.

Jun must have read his expression; her grin widened another centimeter. "Feisty girl, eh? But I'll bet she'll be a good medicine for you. When do I get to meet her?"

"I don't know. I'm meeting her tomorrow at Kichijoji. _If_ she turns up."

"If? There can't be any _if's_ here. We're talking about you. No one can resist an offer from you."

That was why he was very unpleasantly surprised now. She had to be the first one to yell at him and turn him down and call him horrible names. As much as it pained him to admit it, he couldn't really lie to his sister. "Just one. Just that one girl, who has to slap me and punch me in the nose whenever I try to even touch her damned skin. But don't get me wrong, Jun." He flashed his eyes dangerously to his sister. "I have _not_ lost my touch. I will make her marry me and I will quit this stupid worthless job the moment I get the chance."

He received a slightly sad smile in return. "Just... just don't hurt her, alright? She may be a bit feisty, but she's still a normal girl. It isn't fair to her if you just use her."

Ren shrugged unfeelingly. "I don't really care. She's just a tool; I'll get rid of her the moment I quit the job."

That said, and not wanting to feel anymore guiltier, he stood up and headed for his room. He had a plan to make.

* * *

End chapter 3. Dunno when the next update'll be. XD;;


	4. Countdown

**Chinese Idol**

Chapter 4: Countdown

Disclaimer: Shaman King does not belong to me. FMA doesn't either. (WHERE DID THAT COME FROM- uh. You'll see. But not cross-overed! No crossover!)

HAHA YES I'M ALIVE. ...Wait, I said the same thing last time, didn't it? Uh. Yes. I did. It's short AGAIN, but it's all I can manage now. I've already sold off my Mankin manga, too, so I have no reference to check if I'm writing IC anymore. Everything is based on memory, I apologize. And now the long awaited the chapter 4!

* * *

9:46. 14 minutes 'till date time.

It was a lost cause, anyway. There was no freaking way she could go to Kichijoji in less than 30 minutes, and she'd also stuck all her proper clothes in the washing machine yesterday (on purpose), so all she had right now was the pink lollipop pajama she was currently wearing. And everyone knew that people at Kichijoji wore those dreadful cosplay dresses, looking like old-fashioned maids from old horror movies. Or so one of her friends in Hokkaido had informed her, after watching a Tokyo tour show on TV.

Yawning, she sunk down lower on the beaten up old sofa and flicked on the TV. On the right-hand corner of the screen, it reminded her that there were only 11 more minutes in big red numbers. Feeling annoyed at the Wake Up News channel, she quickly changed the channel and stopped at an old rerun of the 'Prince of Tennis'.

Feeling extremely confused and slightly annoyed, she squinted at the screen desperately trying to understand why the hell Kirihara's eyes were red. Tennis matches were confusing.

"...Pirika?"

She ignored the voice, and continued staring at the screen as if hypnotized by the unrealistic tennis moves. Was that even _possible_ to do in real life?

"I-it's almost 10, don't you have to go...?"

Unconsciously, her eyes flickered toward the digital clock set on the small tea table. 9:57. 3 more minutes. It figured; the show had ended, and it was running an annoying ending song. She hated beginning and ending songs.

Tamao gave a small uneasy cough. "Pirika, it's practically 10 now... You better get ready fast, or Ren-sama will be very angry at you."

So? She had to bite her tongue to refrain from saying it out loud. Who cared if he got mad and burst a vein or two? It would just be an added bonus. And besides, she had already told her best friend yesterday night that she had no plans to go to Kichijoji. It could be some kind of assault, for goodness sakes. She might be abducted, and taken directly to China to a forced marriage... The evil lord Ren would laugh maliciously and trap her in a dungeon with no communication, and oniichan and Tamao would mourn for her, thinking she was already dead... Oh, poor poor Pirika!

Another careless glance at the clock. 30 seconds. Maybe, if she was lucky, he wasn't that serious after all, and would let her off the hook. And then he could find a more willing, pretty bitch to marry and leave her the hell alone.

10 seconds. 9 seconds. 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2...

A small, quiet electronic buzzing sound filled the room, and it sure wasn't coming from the Fullmetal Alchemist show currently running on TV.

Silence, as Tamao stared at the shaking cellphone sitting on the coffee table. Pirika was trying very hard to ignore it, staring at Ed and that weird robot thingie running through an alley. Oh, look, he formed a wall!

"...Aren't you going to answer it?"

Her hand did stretch towards the small machine, but instead of flipping it open Pirika threw it towards the wall, an evil crack echoeing through the room. The shaking stopped immediately.

Suddenly, another phone began to ring- En's customer service phone. Pirika would bet all her belongings that it was Ren. Good lord, how did he even know that she was staying at the En?

Anna entered the room, wearing an old white robe. "Why didn't you pick it up?" She said, giving them the evil eye.

The reciever was picked up before Pirika could try and stop her. But perhaps letting Anna answer his stalkerish calls was a good idea.

"Hello, minshuku En, may I help you?"

Anna calmly listened to the other end of the line, her expression still blank. Pirika feverently hoped that she wouldn't remember yesterday's conversation and invite him to the En.

However, Pirika shouldn't have worried, because Anna calmly placed the phone back on the reciever, a voice still ranting on. With a final click, the phone was returned to it's righful spot and the mistress walked out of the room looking slightly annoyed. She gave them a final glance, and waved. "Have you eaten breakfast?"

Indeed, a pleasant aroma was wafting in from the kitchen, depite the late time. It was probably Ryu's second time making breakfast today; her brother and Yoh weren't the type to wake up early. And since she hadn't eaten either, it would be fun joining in on the brunch he was preparing. Ryu made lovely fried fish.

Feeling suddenly free, she stretched out and turned off the TV. Tamao was still standing uneasily at the doorway, fiddling her fingers.

"Pirika, really..."

"Why, it's such a sunny day, I think I'll go take a peek outside."

It was the worst mistake she could ever make. She stepped outside in her pajamas, shielding her eyes and marvelling at the not very clean pond. The backyard of the En was connected to the front door as well, and she could hear excited voices outside. Guests, perhaps?

Feeling the need to help out the sales at the En, she skipped towards the entrance to welcome in the new guests. In her pajamas, but that would probably make a more at-home accent, wouldn't it?

However, as she neared, she saw that it was not new guests producing the voice but old guests and some random passerbys, aweing at the long black limo parked outside the shabby En.

Oh god, please, no.

She whirled around, feeling strangely nervous as she got ready to run for her life and back into the En, when a familiar sexy voice stopped her.

"Nice clothes."

Her pajamas. The Bastard was staring at her in her _pajamas_! Everyone was now staring at her curiously, and her face was slowly turning redder by the second. Her body wouldn't move as she stood there, stock still, although her mind screamed for her to run, run, far away from him.

"I assume you slept in, eh, Pirika_ dear_?"

He grabbed her wrist, examining her from head to toe, taking in her messy hair and crinkled pajama. People were staring, and they were beginning to recognize Ren. She was sure she heard a 'Ren-sama' in there somewhere.

She was going to get eaten by the crowd again. No fangirl mobs again. Please. She needed to talk to him somewhere alone and knock some sense into him. And convince him that she was _not_ going to marry him.

Pirika finally seemed to regain control of her legs, and so she quickly pulled Ren into the En, running past a sleepy looking Yoh and a bewildered Ryu. Her room would be a good, quiet, place to talk. If he didn't try and jump her.

"I'm happy to know that you finally realized what you want, but suddenly taking me to your room to make out might be a little sudden for an unexperienced girl like you-"

_WHACK!_

"-OW, that was _so_ not necessary, Piri-chan-"

_WHACK!_

"You call me Piri-chan again, and I will throw you out the window, got it?"

Ren scowled, rubbing his sore head. "Violent girl. That better be the last time you hit me, or I'll sic my lawyers on you. Who I am sure you are friendly with, thanks to your snowboarding crazed brother."

That infuriating bastard. How dare he bring her brother up?

The door clicked shut as Pirika hauled Ren in, quickly locking the door. She did not need Horohoro walking in on them, or random fangirls following them in. The chinese star, however, seemed amused as he took in his surroundings. There wasn't much, since it was one of the guest rooms and Pirika had only brought one small duffel bag which she still hadn't unpacked.

She placed her hands on her hips, glaring at the smirking idol. But he was the first to speak up, in a lofty tone as if nothing was his fault. "So may I ask why you didn't show up today?"

"In case you don't remember, it was a one-sided planning and I never agreed, did I?"

"Yes you did, although it isn't as if you had any choice in that matter. I trusted you, you know."

Trust? _He_ was talking about _trust_?

"I don't get why you aren't more thrilled that you get to breath the same air I'm breathing in." He raised an eyebrow. "Oh, wait, are you a lesbian? I knew it. You like that pink haired girl, don't you? Because that would really explain your resistance with my charms-"

"SHUT UP!"

_CLANK!_

A thick book sailed past Ren's pointy head and slammed into the wall, nearly making a dent. She glared hard at him, and thus the staring contest began. Blue eyes verse yellow. Pirika shivered slightly. The intensity was getting to her. She finally looked away, and feeling pissed off about losing to this childish game, she picked up a random ruler lying around and hurled it towards him. She hoped it poked his eye out.

The second clank was never heard; of course well-trained superman Ren was able to catch it with his superb reflexes. The ruler was carelessly tossed back to her, and she let it fall to the floor. And all of a sudden, she felt immensely tired.

"Get out. Get out of my room."

Ren just smirked, leaning against the wall. "I will, if you come with me."

She wanted nothing more then to see his cold dead corpse lying on the road beneath her window. "Out, out, out, OUT-"

He rolled his eyes at her, as if dealing with a child. "But geez, Pirika, _you_ brought me in here-"

This was true, but her anger meter had obviously passed it's limit and bursting a vein really hurt. She had no patience to convince him of anything; perhaps it would have been possible, if there were a few thousand kilo and an ocean between them. The miracle of internets and telephones, if only he used them too.

But then he had turned his back on her, calmly opening the door. He waved a hand at her with a secretive smile on his face. "If you want me out that much, I suppose I'll go. See you, Pirika."

Pirika could only gawk at the door as it clicked shut. Well... That was good. She could calm down now. But why had Ren suddenly changed his mind-?

An image of Tamao screaming at the sight of her dream man and Horohoro witnessing Ren coming out of her room flashed through her brain.

_Ohshitohshitohshitohshitohshit-_

"R-R-R-_REN-SAMA_?"

"HEY! That's- that's MY SISTERS ROOM!"

How come all the rooms were connected to the rec room? What happened to the halls? Even ancient houses had halls in them. The En really needed a makeover.

Pirika was out in a flash, desperately thinking of some way to salvage the situation which could seriously not get any worse. At the rec room, Ren was standing arrogantly in front of Horohoro, crossing his arms and looking as confident as ever, even with her brother glaring at him with his evilest glare.

"And what were _you_," Horohoro said fiercely, poking him in the chest sharply, "Doing in my little sister's room? Even _I'm_ not allowed in there!"

He smirked, and turned his eyes to Pirika instead while talking to Horohoro. "I have permission; we're engaged, you see."

He'd done it again. The casually uttered e-word that could cause distructure absolutely anywhere by anyone. It took a second for Horohoro to register what he had just said, his eyes slowly widening in disbelief before throwing back his head and laughing like a maniac.

"You? _Engaged_ with my sister? You _wish_." After his laughter had died away, his expression suddenly turned scary as he snarled at him, "And you aren't to lay a finger on her, because Pirika is off-limits to everyone, and you aren't any exception. Now walk straight out the door and never darken our doorway again, you hear?"

"Well, it was actually Piri-chan over there," Ren stressed the 'chan' oh so lovingly and wickedly continued, "Who pulled me into her room and locked the door."

Two pairs of eyes' whipped back towards here disbelievingly.

"I-I- Well, you're lying. Pirika doesn't do those kind of things without my permission. Right, Pirika?" Horohoro defensively wrapped his arms around her shoulder and pulled her away from him, still glaring wolf-like at Ren.

She should just tell the truth, explain everything that had happened in the cursed jet and about the phonecall- but somehow, seeing Ren's confident smirk directed at her and her brother, instinct told her that it probably wouldn't go at all well and Ren would probably hitch up another ridiculous fib that would make _her_ at fault. Tread carefully around the tiger; although the tiger already had its fangs poised at her neck.

Oh, who cared if she lied to her brother again? She was probably going to end up in hell anyway, for being in debt so much. "He's just- just a friend of mine, from Hokkaido. He's a real flirt, you see, but we're all used to it now. Just ignore him."

Of course he wouldn't back down so easily. Both he's.

"Hold on a moment, Pirika-"

"Is that a way to treat your fian- OUCH!"

Pirika smiled sweetly at her brother. "He's delusional, so don't worry about him. I'm going to go send him off on a plane to Chi- Hokkaido now, okay, oniichan?" She desperately tried to send a telepathic message to Tamao with her eyes, to take away Horohoro. Tamao seemed to have understood, and pulled lightly on his arm.

"H-Horohoro-kun, I think brunch might be ready now. I heard Ryu is making fish and pancakes."

His ears perked up at the words 'pancake' and 'fish', but glared accusingly back at Ren again. "Well, if you're leaving, I'm not objecting. Pirika, do you really have to accompany him? I don't want to leave you alone with a delusional guy."

"Nothing to worry about, oniichan! I'll be back as soon as possible, so leave me pancakes, okay?"

Thank god for her brother's love for food. "Okay, then. And_ you_, if I find out that you've laid a finger on my sister, you'll wish you'd never been born, you hear?"

And Horohoro ran to the kitchen, yelling "PANCAKES!" Again, Pirika was glad her brother had an obsession for food.

Fingers wrapped around her wrist and tugged her towards the door. "Now that we're clear, let's continue our date, shall we? After you've, ah, dressed. Although I think you look absolutely _flattering_ in pink."

Aha. "I don't have any clothes. They're in the washing machine, and I don't have anything else." She mustered up the most apologetic smile she could manage, but it only turned out looking like a smug smile. "So I guess I can't go out today with you; wouldn't want the great _Ren-sama _seen with a random girl in pajamas, would we?"

"You only bought _one set of clothes_? Are you really a girl?"

Pirika crossed her arms. "I like to travel light. So, my favorite pancakes are waiting for me. See ya, _Ren-sama_."

He caught her wrists again. "I'm not letting you go." He snarled. "You can wear my sister's clothes, and we'll go to Kichijoji for some shopping. I'll pay. Happy?"

"But I'm hungry."

Obnoxious, self-centered woman... "I'll take you to ALLT GOTT. Swedish. Happy?"

"I don't want heavy food. I want McDonalds."

Ren was horrified. McDonalds? He'd never stepped foot into McDonalds! But seeing her devilish smile, he could only sigh and nod. "Fine. McDonalds it is. Happy?"

The Ainu girl nodded enthusiastically and latched onto him arm. "Happy!" She chirped happily. She was going to make his day hell.

* * *

End chapter 4. Where the hell did I get ALLT GOTT from? My Nikkei Best Restaurant Guide 2006. >D It only has expensive shops. Perfect for our Ren-sama. And it even has a Kichijoji section. Hahahaha.


End file.
